Here’s another video that ranks on my all-time list. Not much in the way of cinematic art, but the menagerie of concepts is genius. Through numerous viewings I have concluded the following (listed in chronological order):
1. Nothing kills a good studio session like Death.
2. Since Kanye didn’t produce Mines, it would seem we can look forward to another album! And from the looks of it, it’s gonna go Gold!!
3. Danny’s intestines are toxic, so if you’re buying organs on the black market, steer clear.
4. Not only does their “Infinite Energy” theory oppose the laws of thermodynamics, closer inspection of their 5th-grade poster board reveals the following:
- A not-so-discreet insult to Sir Isaac Newton claiming, “Newton was wrong.” Pretty bold move, guys.
- If I were them, I’d take a cue from the razor industry and boost their yo-yo input to five! Although from the picture, it looks like Brent has trouble with three blades.
- Death can be tricked by confusing formulas. Why isn’t Einstein still alive?!
- You can’t just divide a well-established equation by “x” and take the limit as x approaches 0 any time you want a result to approach infinity. Otherwise my grocery budget would involve the following formula:
C = (B/S)/x
where
C = Cookies for Me
B = Cookie Budget
S = Cost of a Package of Cookies
X = time spent in the store
Accordingly, the less time I spend in the store, the more cookies for me. Fuck yeah!
5. High fives on moving trampolines are worth 35.
6. When it comes to merchandising, bigger is better.
7. Finally, make your burial plans elaborate. Who cares, you’re not paying. Let your family figure out whether you were kidding.
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